ADHD and being Mrs. Brightside
Finding the silver lining in a brain wired for novelty
In late March on the first bright and toasty day of early spring, I peeled my winter-weary butt off my home office chair to take a lunchtime stroll through my neighborhood. My best Pandora station (yes, I still use Pandora because all other music apps intimidate my neurodivergent brain) pulled up “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers. The song triggered a memory from several years ago when running was my hyperfixation, and I trained for a half marathon. I immediately wanted to take off in a sprint. Every time I run I get a rush of happy endorphins - especially when I have the right playlist.
Suddenly I was struck by one of the biggest upsides of late-diagnosed ADHD: figuring out that we, while challenged in many ways, get the opportunity to live life to its absolute capacity through our natural proclivity for consumption. We’re cravers of “more”, and we will always be on a quest for it. And that means we get to DO “more”.
Running half marathons, learning to abstract paint, doing DIY projects, writing books, chasing dreams, learning skills, researching topics, taking risks, trying new foods, seeking novel experiences, planning exciting trips. All of it. Gimme more…
…more living.
If you read my last blog, I recently returned from a trip to Mexico where I dragged my family on a spelunking excursion in the depths of the Mayan underworld. So fun! Last week, I asked my mom if she wants to take a class to learn to speak Italian with me. She said yes!
On April 8, 2024, I had the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see the solar eclipse in totality in Huron, Ohio, and I finished it off with a breathtakingly-cold plunge into a 42-degree Fahrenheit Lake Erie! Something to which I’ll never be able to do justice with words, the eclipse was midnight and morning simultaneously, a sunset and sunrise all at once. The temperature dropped nearly 10 degrees in an instant. Birds flew from every direction, and there was a brilliant diamond halo streaming around the dark silhouette of our moon. Our life-giving sun had disappeared from view, but we knew it was still there from its glow.
A real-life silver lining.
It was an incredible sensory experience that I felt with my entire body, mind and soul.
…………..
You see, there’s this thing we all possess…this “ADHD itch”… it drives us to thirstily imbibe and experience life more intensely than our neurotypical peers.
It’s why so many of us love movies and books when we can squeeze them in. We are empaths to the maximum degree, so we get to live the lives of those we’re watching on screen or reading about on pages. We feel all their feels. In a way, I’ve lived a thousand different lives and been on countless adventures all across the world!
Famous basketball player, coach and motivational speaker Jimmy Valvano said there are three things everyone should do each day: laugh, think and cry. He said if you do this, you live a full day… a full life.
If that’s true, how lucky are those of us with ADHD? I’ve laughed, thought and cried all in the last five minutes!
If you’re new to this diagnosis, you will have your ups and downs with it. You’ll have days of unshakable regret thinking of how different life could have been had you not had ADHD or if you had found out sooner. You’ll have days that feel hopeless and lonely. You’ll have days that feel like the light in the sky is gone for good.
But know that you can have days like this, too.
Days when you embrace the excitement, the wonder, and the possibility that comes with having a brain wired for novelty. Days when you feel immense gratitude for the ability to feel with such passion. Days when you want to take off running because the sun - our amazing star - is shining brightly and Pandora is playing an absolute banger.
Welcome that ADHD itch. Life will never be dull ❤️
There’s always a bright side.