Hi Liz. Thanks for sharing this vulnerable piece with us. My heart goes out to you. I am 59 and JUST piecing it together that I have ADHD. I am not even diagnosed yet, but I was diagnosed with both generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder at 38, when I hit a wall of grief, overwhelm, exhaustion, stress, and a growing disconnect in my marriage. My kids were 6 and 3. My panic and anxiety were so great that I was barely sleeping for fear of dying. My neurodivergence took a huge toll on my marriage, which, after 29 years, ended in 2020. I can see now through the lens of ADHD that my brain differences (and lack of awareness around them) impacted ever facet of my life: work (hello, job and career changes every 1-2 years), my marriage (hello, RSD, insecurity, anxiety, OCD, boredom, disconnect, and eventual infidelity), my parenting (hello, perfectionism and obsession). Ack. It is with both relief and great grief that I have many realizations at this stage of my life. You are spot on that we mourn the life-and the lives of those around us-when we realize all that could have been.
Wow. Thank you so much for sharing this with me. Reading your words is like reading my own brain..."diagnosed with both generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder at 38, when I hit a wall of grief, overwhelm, exhaustion, stress, and a growing disconnect in my marriage." It took my diagnosis, and subsequent treatment and ongoing healing to crawl my way back from the impact of being ignored by the system. You are not alone. Our experiences, unfortunately, are not unique, and so many of us pay such high prices from being let down in such an egregious way. Late diagnosis is in fact a blessing - because it happens at all - but it is also a tragedy. There's so many "what ifs" to unpack, but hopefully now with your answers you can look forward to a life of "wonder ifs". Sending neurodivergent hugs your way.
Hi Liz. Thanks for sharing this vulnerable piece with us. My heart goes out to you. I am 59 and JUST piecing it together that I have ADHD. I am not even diagnosed yet, but I was diagnosed with both generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder at 38, when I hit a wall of grief, overwhelm, exhaustion, stress, and a growing disconnect in my marriage. My kids were 6 and 3. My panic and anxiety were so great that I was barely sleeping for fear of dying. My neurodivergence took a huge toll on my marriage, which, after 29 years, ended in 2020. I can see now through the lens of ADHD that my brain differences (and lack of awareness around them) impacted ever facet of my life: work (hello, job and career changes every 1-2 years), my marriage (hello, RSD, insecurity, anxiety, OCD, boredom, disconnect, and eventual infidelity), my parenting (hello, perfectionism and obsession). Ack. It is with both relief and great grief that I have many realizations at this stage of my life. You are spot on that we mourn the life-and the lives of those around us-when we realize all that could have been.
Wow. Thank you so much for sharing this with me. Reading your words is like reading my own brain..."diagnosed with both generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder at 38, when I hit a wall of grief, overwhelm, exhaustion, stress, and a growing disconnect in my marriage." It took my diagnosis, and subsequent treatment and ongoing healing to crawl my way back from the impact of being ignored by the system. You are not alone. Our experiences, unfortunately, are not unique, and so many of us pay such high prices from being let down in such an egregious way. Late diagnosis is in fact a blessing - because it happens at all - but it is also a tragedy. There's so many "what ifs" to unpack, but hopefully now with your answers you can look forward to a life of "wonder ifs". Sending neurodivergent hugs your way.
Ooh. “Wonder ifs”
Love that reframe.